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Nonbinary people are either like "let me pull up three different flowcharts a pie chart a linear regression of Bolivia's maple imports in 1978 this clip from an early 2001's indie German space rock opera and twelve pictures of this obscure poet's tableau to explain my gender" or are like *points to cool rock on the ground* "gender"

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Cis people are so brave like, I can't imagine being cis that must be so hard every day, I wouldn't be able to do it honestly

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Russian epics be like: This is Vodonyashkamishankovilecivic also know as Yuri and also known as Geralt and also known as Tim and also know as Vodon and also known as Misha and also know as Viktor

Me: o-ok

Russian epic: anyways he dies two lines after the introduction

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Me sowing: haha yaaay eeeeee
Me reaping: uh oh oh no uh uh oops uh oh whoppsie oh no uh oh oh no

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@bees a ghost tried to approach me, it /didn't/ get leery. sorry to knuckles but I'm different

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Bro my legs cannot hurt so much from walking 50 blocks -___- someone whip me into shape right now

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Swiff is one of the most underrated posters on here

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My least favorite genre of joke is person trying to be clever in the comments of a tumblr post. Didnt like it then, dont like it now

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I'm basically the lesbian version of tantalus (dehydrated)

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Endurance hunting, as the noble sandwich can outpace any human on the dead sprint. It must be a battle of degrees, of my will versus that of the sandwich

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Hunting great roving herds of sandwiches armed with nought but a spear and my wits, as did my ancestors

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famous dnd character Melf, which is short for Male Elf I'd Like to Fuck

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saw a tiktok that said that if you have stuffed pokemon toys in your room then you're gay, and all the comments were like "*looks at stuffed pokemon toys* yep"

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chainsaw man was made in a lab specifically to make alice cum to death if she ever reads it, but, like a cat you bought a new toy for, she'd rather do just about anything else

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Bro i just passed someone on the street getting what sounded like 20 monads notifs in a row

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showing up to a american cancer society meeting and getting confused when i dont see any astrology stuff

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honey.town

honey.town is a small hive of 6,001 bees, most of which are in a trenchcoat, and one that's simply buzzing around.